Old Year, New Year

As the days are winding down to 2017.
Things have gone from good to bad.
I hope 2018 will be better for everyone.
No matter what the reason it could be.
I know we lost a few.
But, in the world that needs to be help.
Sometimes, we need to be there for one and another.
To the good and the bad.
We need things change.
Most of all, some of us need a fresh start.
While others do what they can do.
To 2018, we are ready.
To 2017, bye.

Tell me why.

I want to be separate from you.
But, you are revealing so much to me, I can't let you go.
Yet, I still don't get why you and your friends are so obsessed with her.
Heck, you did not explain it to anyone.
Just show signs of obsessions.
I want to ask.
But, my shyness is preventing me.
I want to know why you are so obsessed with her?
You are not making me feel welcome.
If I have gain more followers and viewers on Twitch and if they know you are so not nice.
I would question myself to do a raid to your channel.
I don't want to have that happen, because you are so nice.
Another thing is that I am afraid to give you bits.
Because you know it will be from the ads I had to interact with.
Terrible ones.
I know you would complain.
But, I been holding them on.
Watching more.
When I want to, but suddenly, someone else does and they admit it.
You are upset about it.
I want to watch you without the guilt of information I know.
But, it is only jealousy is playing me.
All I want to say is tell me why.
Why you are obsessed?

I feel sad because of a photo I should not seen

Steve Corino on the right with a WWE NXT Superstar on the left (credit: Steve Corino on Twitter)

I got way too curiously to see something.
A photo I should not seen.
I am a different person.
But, something is wrong with me.
I can't let go the feeling.
I feel sad because of a photo I should not seen.
I need to unfollow Steve Corino.
It's just I don't hold ill will to him.
It's just the pain I have.
When my heart belongs to someone else.
That someone else that Corino don't know of.
But, someone that the person in that photo knows of.
No, not the man in the middle.
It is the man on the left.
Seeing him almost looking like me.
That is why I am feeling sad.

Even what I said it could be true.
It could be a lie.
But, my heart could belong to someone else that neither man knows.
Or even both men do know.
As of right now.
I feel sad because of a photo I should not seen.
I am upset.

Abu Dhabi

Sasha Banks (Left) and Alexa Bliss (Right). (Photo credit Triple H via Twitter)

Abu Dhabi is a place of wonder.
But hardships for women were bad.
That is until things change.
Women will have confidence thanks to Sasha Banks and Alexa Bliss.
The two in bodysuits performed in front of others.
Give women hope.
I hope to see more into this.
Maybe it will be nice. 

Misery in the form of my parents and my brother

I am a lost soul with misery in the form of my parents and my brother.
I want and need the one who would save me from the misery.
I am so lost.
Can you be it?
I hope it is.
But, I don't know.
I know some, but, the feelings is not there.
I don't know why.
But it's crazy.
But, all I want to know if it's you.
Before the misery takes me.

California Wildfires (A fear)

I had a fear that in California the wildfire is going to be very bad.
One day it would hit a few I know of.
Yes, my favorite family, The DeFrancos.
YouTubers at the best.
I know Phil is in the zone.
Linz at home with her boys.
I hope they are safe.
Also another YouTuber who might be at harm.
But, as what I know he might be not.
It's ya boi, Jordan Maron.
I hope he is safe too.
I don't know if this wildfire would grow.
But, I hope it doesn't.
Because I do not want to reach my uncle.
Who lives in San Diego.
I heard he works somewhere around there or Los Angeles.
I hope they are safe.
I had this fear coming.
This is happening, but, don't make it true.
Please don't.

Communities are starting to come together

I do not like when things go bad to worse.
But, it already had.
From dealing with one part of a community.
To seeing another.
Really coming at wavelength.
All I see was abuse.
Sexual no doubt.
Has anyone learned about what happened in Hollywood?
I guess not.
I am really am sick from this.
I want to see justice from this.
No suspending for a month crap!

Four men reminded me of a man

This afternoon as I was walking around town.
Four men looking to invest.
They decided to get food from the deli.
For some odd reason I don't know why.
But, one person, a man came to my mind.
I hope he does not get mad at me for saying this.
But, I have no choice to say it.
The one who came to my mind because of those four men, is Meza.
Yes, my favorite Twitch Streamer, Meza.
Why him?
It's because of a vlog he done on one of his channels on YouTube.
I can't believe that was the first one that came into my mind.
I know it's silly.
But, can you not blame me?

A happiness I want

A winter wonderland.

A man worth her wait.

A night not to forget.

A happiness to them both.

A love so crazy.

A hope so bright.

A escape to sadness.

A trust to happen.

A place to be free.

A happiness I want.

Thank you

Meza.
I want to say thank you for making me happy.
I know it's ridiculous, but my family is pushing me to the edge.
But, your streams, videos, anything of you, became an escapism for me.
I don't know how to repay you.
All I could say thank you.
But, I feel it is not enough.
I don't know how to express it.
But, this poem is all I have to say.
Thank you.

I am offended

How can you tell someone about their weight by what they eat, but don't care if they walk?
Just insult them.
That is what happened to me.
My own father.
He don't care at all of my walk.
Just my eating habits.
I just had leftover pizza from a local restaurant.
Not those chain restaurants.
Why would he care for that?
Because he believes that I would have more problems at my mother's age.
Which it is 30 plus years.
Just don't care if I walk.
I am offended.
Jerk.

I am losing my mind

The days are cold.
The family is weird.
The doubt on my mind is weary.
I question the trust on anyone.
To be it can be.
I am so annoyed.
It's just how I know.
I am just alone.

My family has no boundaries or respect.
The people I thought I know could hate me.
But, the only thing is keeping me insane.
Is a man or two.
But, who are they?

Can't say.
It's a secret.
Yeah, that's all I am saying.

This is a really odd situation

How can you react when someone you know follows you on Twitter and again?
That is what is going on.
I don't know why, but, it happens during two times.
I don't know how or what.
Yet, why is this a problem?
I do not know.
It gives me more information that I know of the man.
But, it does not make this up to who he likes.
But, I don't know anymore.
This is odd.
This is a really odd situation.

This Christmas is messed up

It's that time of year.
When you have to buy the gifts.
For the ones you know don't deserve it.
It's hard to get what you want for that family member.
Unless someone else in your family get you involved.

It's hard for friends and lovers too.
Unless they told you.
Then it could be easy.
Unless they want something expensive.
You need new ones by then.

For me, I got a new phone weeks ago.
I need a new wire for my tablet.
Also, I need a laptop or a computer that does gaming and let me be on the internet.
I also need friends to understand me.
Also a lover to understand me.
Also to show off.
He would be better then my brother's lover.
Because I have no ideal, what she looks like.

This Christmas is messed up.

My family and their "friends"

I don't know how to handle this.

But, my family are insane.

With their "friends", I can't trust.

From my father's bar buddies.

To my brother's bowling dorks.

Not to mention those shrews that my mother called friends.

I been betrayed by them.

I tried to warn them.

No point.

It's so weird.

Weird like me being on discord.

I don't know why.

But, I feel like they don't belong.

I don't

I don't want to hurt you.
But, you hurt me.
I move on.
You in love in with her.
I can't see you ever again.
But, you want me.
I can't let you.
You will hurt my feelings.
I know you were once mine.
But, I want to be with him.
I don't want to see your face.
The memories are too painful.
I want to move on.
He has been there for me.
You haven't.
I rather be happy.
Then deal with the madness.

My head is spinning

My head is spinning.
To what problem has occurred?
The ending of a video.
Mixed in with someone follow me!
Prey tell this question is to be.
Is it something that we need to be worried?
No, it's how mess up I am.
To fall in love.
Also, what the heck was in the ending you are wondering?
Yeah, let's not say a word about it.

My heart hurts

A man who have make me blush.
Who has so much secrets.
But, so obsessed with a streamer.

This is where I have to draw the line.

Before it's too late.

My heart does not need another man to love, just to be in love with someone else.

I don't want him to be like those who hurt me.

Those fools.

The vegan dork.

The tall dork.

The shorty dork.

Also, the menace who can't wrestle.

Not to mention the vegan dork was in the same show as the woman who believes in a fallacy about vaccines.

It hurts me.

I wish this madness ends.

My heart is for someone else.

Not the fool who cause trouble with YouTube.

I know who it is.

Just don't know if he knows.

He hasn't said much since the night before Thanksgiving.

The bot

I am kinda freak out.
I know there is a lot of anger or worried.
It's because of a bot.
It's been warned and be careful.
I do not want a bot unless it's the ones recommended.
I do not like things to be mess up.
I want to stream.
But, this bot is messing everything up.
Now I regret of tweeting it.
Some want me to keep it.
I want to delete it.
That bot mess with everything.